Long time no see!
I've been having some trouble getting a blog organised in my swirling blob of senseless brain! One of the most difficult challenges I have with my M.E./CFS (or my elephant, if you're not sick of the analogy by now!) is coping with reading, and writing text.
Just organising the thoughts, finding words that sound like they came from an earthling, (not some alien creature with a 'Teach Yourself English' phrasebook!) and then getting them down in print is a mammoth task for me. I'm often starting blogs, then after a few minutes I'm left disorientated and exhausted by the effort. In real pain and sensory meltdown.
To M.E./CFS newbies this must seem very weird, and kind of irrational-as sometimes I manage to string the sentences together almost coherently!
I can't write if I'm tired, shaking, in too much pain, being spoken to, or there's ANY kind of background noise. I need total quiet to have a chance of having a clear enough stream of thoughts.
I'm struggling big time just now, thinking about packing this blog in, as my husband (never gets it -Bless him!) has been in my bedroom giving me a rundown of something that happened to him yesterday. I know if I tell him to tell me later he'll be upset, so I just sit, and my brain loses all train of thought.
He's gone now, but my train has gone with him! VERY frustrating as I've been struggling with this all week!
It's almost a physical sensation. I'll try to describe it whilst it's happening, excuse any bad or mixed up sentences from here on.....
My head feels different, solid almost. I'm trying to find words and sentences to describe it but a list is easier-
heavy, turmoil, chaos, over-capacity, confusion, jammed up, can't think a thought to it's end - it gets lost-I get lost! I must stop-not the blog post I had in mind today, but I can't remember what it was. Maybe we have hubby to thank!
Humour-gone, coherency-gone, thinking-gone. Sorry!
I will be back !