Just a little step towards a dream

Another small milestone has been reached in my attempts to travel with my pony, dray, ME/CFS and my elephants. We now have Sylvia's dray and have tried Merlin in it, just to see if he fitted and would be happy to pull it.

He is used to pulling a fairly lightweight two wheeled carriage with hubby and I on it, but now we are asking for something a little more from his little spotty legs! The dray is built completely out of wood, with large heavy wheels, and huge steel springs-Merlin could quite rightly have said 'NO!', but to his credit, he was happily pulling it with three adults and an excited terrier on board, after just 5 minutes!

Anyone remember Steptoe and Son? (1960's comedy about Rag and Bone men in London) My hubby has downloaded the theme tune, and we intend to play it when we go out (When nobody is about I might add)! Maybe I'll have to invest in flat caps and knotted scarves for us both!!!

We need to sort some little bits out, then we can try longer journeys with him and the dray, just a few miles at first to build his strength, then maybe more-we'll see and take it very much step by step.

I know where we can stow the camping gear, clothes, food, water etc..... but I'm not sure how my elephant will fit in with travelling and camping by horsedrawn vehicle. It could either be ok, or disasterous and I don't think I'll know till I try. I've never been one to shy away from an experience just because I have ME/CFS though.

It's completely unknown territory for me, being sick and doing this crazy thing. I will just have to be sensible, plan for resting and recouperating, and listen when my body crys "ENOUGH!"

But one thing's for sure, I'll keep on blogging about it, if nothing else it's a great way to record things for my own treacle-slushy brain, I'd really hate to forget!!

More Precious Moments.....!

Well, I've promised an update to my last post all week. It's taken this long to sort my head and it's antics out - I'm having a few more neurological symptoms than I'm used to. Lots of fun with hearing issues, shock-like reactions to touch and especially unexpected sounds etc etc...you know the drill. Enough of that, it's just not too exciting to write about, I need to work out what's going on before I can share much.

Anyhooo, we spent a wonderful evening with Sylvia on Wednesday-sitting by her fire, eating chocolate biscuits and drinking tea. I gave her a book, and she gave me a couple of things in return...which are the best gifts I could imagine.

Firstly, she has offered us her 'dray' to borrow every summer. This is a large-ish, flat, wooden, 4-wheeled farm cart for Merlin to pull. We can put a top on it, and use it to go for weekends and holidays away, all summer. She will have it back in the winter, when she's at home, cos she uses it then.

I am thrilled! It is something I've ALWAYS wanted to do, travel with horsedrawn vehicle, and now here's my chance. It is a pretty M.E. friendly thing to do too, if I have a companion with me I can lie down, resting or sleeping any time I need to, leaving the driving to someone else, perfect!

I aim to get a peek at it, then get it delivered to where Merlin lives. We'll try him with it, (he may take a few trys to get used to it) then we'll get it home to put a top on and make it habitable. Thank heavens for very handy DIY 'savvy' fathers-in-law I say! If all goes to plan it may be on the road in about 6weeks! I'll keep ya posted!!!

The second gift she gave me, is the feeling that I am moving on, growing and experiencing much more than I thought possible. Her attitude to life is so 'get up and go' and cheerful that it is infectious. I can't help but smile and feel positively energised when I am, or have been around her.

I have begun to think much more like a healthy person, with limitations, again...rather than a permanently sick one, struggling to get through each day (which is mentally where I've been for many more years than I care to think about).

I, and my health have not changed one iota, but if I can maintain the more positive way of thinking it has surely got to make my journey with ME/CFS and the inevitable elephants more bearable. These last couple of weeks have been quite good, despite my worsened symptoms and a few emotional wobbles...I'd have let it all bother me much more before.

This renewed feeling of optimism, and of course, the Dray, are the best gifts I could wish for at this time in my life... (Well, a new bathroom and a semi-naked household slave wouldn't go amiss either, but Sylvia wasn't forthcoming on either of those!!!)

Nothing so precious as........

I am so lucky, I have met, and am meeting some pretty inspirational and special people just lately. I get so much joy from getting to know people, their stories and their friendship. Simple things please simple minds i suppose!!!

Honestly, there is no treasure, no luxury, no art, jewellery, product or gift that can come even a close second to the pleasure I get from simply sharing time with people, and I know some pretty wonderful ones!

There are the enduring friends I have, (let me take you back to my last post) they are special, each and every one. There are the friends I can be M.E./CFS comfy with and the ones I still try to hide some of it from.

There are the new friends I have, from the local support group. There is a large community of 'cyber' friends out there, who all appear at my 'virtual front door', the laptop screen! There are the friends I have through pony and carriage driving and many more from many different walks of life. All superb and wonderful people who I am privileged to know.

I want to tell you about one I have begun to get to know just recently, a special lady in her own category - Sylvia!

Sylvia is a lovely lady who is intelligent, quick, funny, honest and sincere. She is a traveller, still using a horse drawn gypsy caravan and her horse 'Diamond' to get around Britain. She travels for most of the year, stopping off with friends along the way.

I met her last autumn, and then saw her again a couple of weeks ago-I'm having such a blast getting to know her before she moves on again. We have spent a couple of evenings sitting by the fire, drinking tea and just talking about well, I dunno, but it was heavenly.

She has such a different lifestyle, and I admit it, I'm more than ferociously jealous! I am a simple girl at heart, a forager who loves to live simply. But I have to allow my health to take the lead on my lifestyle rather more than I'm happy with but hey! I am still able to lead a great life, just slower and much more cautiously than before, so you won't hear me complaining! (I'll just do it quietly!!!)

On Saturday Sylvia came out with me and my pony and carriage (see my photo on the post 'Myself to Blame') and fell in love with him, he was very good that day! I had the best time, she is such great fun! We talked and talked about stuff that is close to my heart, and hers - horses! Then, back to our yurt for toast and fresh scrambled eggs, laid by my 'girls', she loved it!

I could go on all day, but, I would never have begun driving horses and ponies if it weren't for ME/CFS, so there's a fair chance I would never have met Sylvia, or many of the intensely wonderful people I know now. So for this alone I need to give a huge hug to my 'elephant' when I can get my arms round him (he is a bit big at the moment, and my arms ache!).

I hope that all of us have as pleasant and relaxed a time as possible in this Awareness Week. I'm not sure todays post will do much for awareness, but I hope, if you're new here, you check out some of the previous ones!

Before I go, a warm welcome Jessica, thanks for following over from Facebook! Great to see you!

Take care all,

Zarla

xxx

Myself to blame...!

Well, it had to happen didn't it? I only have myself to blame today, the payback for being healthy enough to go out and do something lovely yesterday has me in it's clutches. That elephant is HUGE - he's dancing on me from head to foot this morning....

Enough of him, lets talk about the 'something lovely'.

I own a pretty cute pony and carriage, as you can see he is a very good boy. My hubby and I took him out yesterday for a trot through the most gorgeous countryside and villages. The sun was out, roads were quiet, pony was happy-blissful! Heck, I even got to talk to hubby about some stuff that had been bothering me.... can it get any better?

The sound of hooves on the road, birds in the hedgerow, and distant farm machinery heralding the start of the farmer's busy season, spring had finally got sunny. We had to stop for photographs, people often leap outta cars and snap us as we pass by - or people in the villages smile and greet us. It really is the most wonderful way to bring on payback, that i know.

But, (and there always is one isn't there?) by the time we trotted back into the driveway, I knew I had overdone my day. The dragging feeling had taken my strength, it was all i could do to climb down and lead Merlin away. Hubby sorted him out, fed him and put him away for me and I came home to bed. Which, if I'm honest, is where I've been ever since - but what a way to get payback??!!

I know that people who see me driving the pony, smiling and enjoying myself, cannot comprehend how it affects me when I do this. They don't see how much pain I have, or the muscle weakness/shaking, headaches, neck and spine that is sore to touch, skin sensations, dizziness and treacle-thinking frustration that hits me soon afterwards. Maybe if they did, my life might be easier.

Should we allow our friends to see us when we are bad? I allowed one once, and after a long time had passed (I think she needed recovery time too!!!) she contacted me and we are still friends, but with a new understanding - I know she believes and understands me better now. Should we let our close friends in to see us at our worst-payback? Would this finish or strengthen a friendship? I dunno, and don't really want to experiment, the stakes are too high.